reflections

I have already begun year-end reflections. On my walk last night, I wound up thinking about all I have to be grateful for. Though this has admittedly been one of the worst years of my life, it has also been one of the best in terms of growth. I suppose that’s how it goes.

I am listening to a new series from some of the people involved with The Secret. This particular one is a conversation with Jack Canfield. He said (and I have heard many times before) that we always do our best with what we know at the time, and with the awareness we have at the time. Sometimes we are not even aware of our own thoughts and the reality we are creating with those thoughts. But once we have that awareness, instead of feeling bad for making the choices we did in the past, we move on, making better choices. Sounds easy, right? Hmm. I think I need that as a running mantra in my subconscious.

This has been a year of people believing in me. That’s a great feeling. I’ve also experienced compassion in a whole new light and thusly gratitude in a new light as well. In a twisted way, this year has been shockingly balanced. I’ve made friends and lost friends. I lied and I was raw and honest. I’ve been shining on stage and hiding in the shadows. I’ve been deleriously depressed and broken and also full of love and certainty.

I guess what this teaches me is that life always finds balance. For me, it happens to come in extremes. Whether through mood swings or experiences, when I’m up I am up and when I’m down, there’s no pulling me up. But I am learning focus, awareness, and attention. Always learning and growing….

~ by Amy on December 6, 2007.